For the homebody holding out for a plan worth putting pants on

The old western wanted-poster look puts out the call, and the fine print asks for one good reason to leave the house. So far, nobody has come forward. Your couch, your blanket, and your quiet evening are all running unopposed.

Wear it to the plans you’re hoping get canceled, the errands you keep stalling on, or the group text you muted on Tuesday. It’s a soft unisex tee with a classic fit and a bold black print. Give one to the friend who RSVPs “maybe” and means no.

Rebel Ink posted the reward, and the couch is still undefeated.