Interest level: flatlined. Please do not attempt to resuscitate the small talk.

You've perfected the polite nod, the half-smile, and the well-timed glance at your phone. None of it works on people who mistake eye contact for an invitation. Printing the disclaimer across your chest saves everyone about ten minutes of effort.

This is the honest version of the answer you were going to give anyway. Your enthusiasm is a limited resource, and you're done spending it on topics that make your eyes glaze over. If someone still wants to ask, they've been warned, and the answer will be brief.

Rebel Ink for the women who ran out of fake enthusiasm years ago.