Silence has fewer calories than every carb you're avoiding.

Someone at brunch has been narrating their entire week in real time, and nobody asked for the director's commentary. You tried nodding along for a solid twenty minutes. Your patience checked out somewhere around mimosa number two.

Everyone's tracking macros, cutting sugar, going dairy-free, and somehow missing the elimination that would actually improve the whole table's mood. Quiet doesn't show up on a nutrition label, but it should. Worth adding to the list.

Rebel Ink says try it before the next round.